The "WHY" Pep Talk

I think I need a pep talk.  I think I need to give myself a pep talk.  I was so hoping that my Dr. would find scar tissue, but when he did, I wasn't expecting to be so so angry about it.  Don't get me wrong, at this point I needed him to find the scar tissue, because now at least I have some hope again for my remaining 8 embies, but...  Why didn't we look sooner, why didn't anyone take me seriously when I said my period was so so so light.  WHY, WHY, WHY!!!!!

I know, I know, things are happening the way they are meant to.  Really!!????  I was meant to go through this for almost two years (and counting).  I was meant to have two miscarriages?  I was meant to feel such utter disappointment that it hurts sometimes to breath!

Not turning into much of a pep talk is it.  Okay, lets try again.

I HAVE 9 WONDERFUL AMAZING BEAUTIFUL HEALTHY EMBRYOS!!!
I HAVE A PERFECTLY HEALTHY AND CLEAR AND JUST WAITING FOR THAT BABY, UTERUS!!!
I HAVE AN AMAZING FAMILY THAT SUPPORTS ME THROUGH ALL MY CRAZY!!!!
(hormones and all)
I AM FERTILE AND WILL BE A MOM COME HELL OR HIGH WATER!!!!!

oh, and I start my foster to adopt classes in 3 DAYS!!!!!

Ok, that helped a little.  I'm sure I'll need to give myself another peep talk soon.

till then....